New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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