Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
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