Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
