Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
