i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize