hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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