Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Randomize
