I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
