i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
