i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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