moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
