I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Randomize
