ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
