I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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