i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
