Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
