Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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