He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
