why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize