quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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