Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
My first STD was from a foam party
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
So vagazzling was a success
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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