Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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