I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
