doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
