I wannas sexs uuuuu
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
