hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Randomize
