If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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