escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I miss vodka workout Fridays
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
