when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
