I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize