My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
