i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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