Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
