what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
