As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Randomize
