i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
