Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize