in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
