You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Randomize
