he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize
