how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
So vagazzling was a success
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Randomize
