All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
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