Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
