The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
