Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
