it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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