She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
