The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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