Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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