Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
